African-American Woman
In my first year at Northeastern, I participated in a program called LEAD360. I was required to complete an assignment that asked me to choose only one of my identities — I had to choose if I more closely identified with being a woman or being Black.
This was birthed from that.
"Do you first consider yourself Black or a woman?"
"Excuse me?"
"Do you first consider yourself a woman or Black?"
"Wait. What?"
African-American —
Not Black enough to be African, not White enough to be American.
Not as "cultured" or as "exotic" as my Caribbean and Hispanic counterparts.
Not dark enough to be your mother's child, not light enough to be your father's.
Not cool to be born with my large features.
Not knowing where you're really from, great great great Grandmommy was a slave, uneducated, drug dealing, fried chicken & chitterling eating —
— JUST Black
You know?
That just not good enough Black,
That just can't be your real hair Black,
That just isn't the job for you Black,
That's just the way it is Black Woman.
— Woman
Too emotional. Too strong.
Too sensitive. Too ambitious.
Too naive. Too feisty.
High-Maintenance. Abrasive. Sassy. Mean. Curvy. Skinny. Hormonal. Domestic. Sexual. Protective.
Woman
ARE YOU ASKING ME IF I PREFER ONE FIGHT OVER THE OTHER?!
If I prefer racism or misogyny?
If I could choose my life, which would I pick to be born with? If either, at all?!
...How did I forget bitter?
Trifling
Angry
This is the African-American woman's story —
Of watching Black men praise the idea of you as their
...anything but their mother, sister, auntie or grandma
Talk for hours about how this you are not and how that you are not
Headphones bumping other Black men's voices glorifying your body,
not for its perfection, but for its use for their pleasure
Justify why they would rather date anyone but you
Why they wouldn't want their children to be exactly like you
Why they would never spend their lives with someone like you
Because African-American women are just too ugly to be so vociferous and confident...
The cute ones, just too independent and hardheaded,
forever thinking they don't need a man...or they're just sluts —
Forgetting African-American women...
How we picked beside you
How we marched beside you
How we fought beside you
How we stand beside you & not behind you
Picked the very first outfit you came home from the hospital in
Marched your dumb self home when you did something dumb
Fought sleep on many a night to provide your needs
Stand to look out the window to see if you're home safe after rising from our knees
praying for the success of your life from when you were 2 to 22
Little Black girl —
Raise your head full of hair
To the God of the Son and the Sun
Providers of all elements your spirit and body need to continue to flourish —
Grace and Light
And keep it high, as any negativity that enters your gentle realm flies by.
My beautiful Black woman —
You are struggle and you are perseverance
You are a Queen among Queens
for your resilience and faithfulness
Wear your melanin proud
Stick your breasts out far
Your age never shows through anything but your words
Wisdom is your strength
Beauty is your heart
Prayer is your guide
You are the fastest growing group of entrepreneurs in America
Your life expectancy is higher than both Black men and White people
You currently hold 2/3 of all Bachelors and Doctorate degrees conferred to all Blacks
and 70% of ALL Master's degrees
You make up the majority of all Blacks enrolled in Law, Medical & Dental school
You lead this nation in labor force participation & maintain that lead after motherhood
You are increasingly represented in management & professional fields
You are everything your mother dreamed you would be.
I am a bearer of life
I am a treasure and a gift
I am a mystery and a masterpiece
I am a force and a sacrifice
I am a visionary and a legend
So, when you ask me if I first consider myself Black or if I first consider myself a woman...
I am African-American and woman equally.
